Last week was my, our birthday and although you stay 16 in my letters, I have aged up. I am now 20. Big, scary 20.
When I remember what I thought my life would be like at 20 I cannot help but laugh at how naive I was as a child. I had this vision that by 20 I would have my own place, my own job and car and be entirely self sufficient, I'd stop by my parents every Sunday to visit and live with friends of mine in town. But life has a funny way of changing plans, especially unrealistic ones. I still live at home, I have a part time job but still rely on my parents for food, pocket money and petrol for the car my parents bought me. I just got a laptop and a brand new phone, also gifts from my parents. All in all, it's safe to say that I am FAR from self sufficient. And Surprisingly, that's okay. None of my friends are self sufficient either, I mean how can they be? Because believe it or not, at age 20...we're more of a child than we ever were growing up.
Okay sure we've got a bit more responsibilities, we're entering adulthood. Some people are taking out loans to study or buy a car. A lot of people I know are balancing jobs with their studies and they live alone so they have to make their own food and do their own laundry. It's things like that that make me grateful for the life I was born into. Life has been somewhat easy for me.
But being any age after 18 and before 30 is play time for a lot of people. We're partying, living the life. Drinking, going to trance parties. Most of us can drive which means we have a whole lot of freedom. It's great.
Anyways, I did not start this letter to tell you about being 20, this letter is to tell you what I've learnt in my life, leading up to being 20. I'll try and keep it simple and try not to forget any vital things.
1. Get used to the word no. You're going to hear it a lot. Sometimes no matter how many times you try or how hard you work the answer could still be no, you could still fail. That doesn't mean you suck at whatever you are doing, it just means it wasn't meant to happen for you right now, and there's always a reason. It's like the saying, "When one Door closes, another door opens". Receiving a no may just be a path to a yes. Don't beat yourself up when you receive a no. No's are a part of life...Get used to them.
2. Be kind to your body and respect your talents. You know my life passion is singing... I love to sing. Earlier this year I found out that I was developing nodules on my vocal chords and it was hampering my singing ability to a massive extent and it still is. And it's all because I wasn't listening to my body. I partied, I was around smokers, I drank and all of those resulted in me losing my voice at least once a week and when I did I would not rest my voice, I'd push through it and keep singing and shouting. Thankfully we got it in early stages so it's not the end of the world, but now I've been set back all because of my own stupidity. Respect your body, it's a temple and you only have one, you cannot replace any body parts, so be careful what you do with it.
3. Be fearless. What is fear anyways? It's an excuse, an excuse to get out of situations or changes we are not ready for. We keep ourselves from living and experiencing so many things in life because we are scared. It won't be easy but it will be worth it. Stop making excuses. Go be fearless.
4. Be true to yourself. Don't live your life for anybody else, or to please others. They're not the ones who have to live your life, you are. Its yours to enjoy. Do what makes you happy and you know what will happen? You will be.
5. People are going to come and go in your life, it's pointless to hold onto people if they are clearly not meant to stay in your life. Everyone comes into your life for a reason...some stay, others move on once they have fulfilled their purpose. Everyone you meet is either a blessing or a lesson, make sure you know the difference.
6. Be careful with your heart. It's inevitable that you will fall in love, it's also inevitable that your heart will get broken. Be careful who you give your heart to, some people are undeserving, some people are just reckless with other people's hearts and some are just confused...it's up to you to decide who is worthy of your love and heart.
7. Forgive. People make mistakes. Life is too short to hold grudges. If someone who is special to you messes up, forgive them. Just make sure you know who is worth your forgiveness, sometimes you're better off without those people.
8. Keep your eyes on your goal at all times. There's no time for distractions. Work every inch of your body to be the best that you can be...Put in the hours, fight to improve your skills, become the ultimate you.
9. Family first. They're the one group of people who are forced to love you. Take advantage of that.
10. Change the things you can and accept the things you can't change. Be content with your present knowing that you cannot change the past...but the future. The future is yours to have. You can change it, mould it, make it the future you want, the possibilities are endless. Life is so short, make sure your story is one worth leading.
Okay that's just the tip of the ice berg of what I want to tell you, but it occurred to me if I tell you it all now, what will I write about in the future? I do hope you've enjoyed our letters, 16 year old me...I hope that somehow I have been able to make some sort of difference in your life by telling you about mine.
Live life while you're young, it only lasts so long.
Yours Truly,
20 Year old Nadine
